It’s August, which happens to be Romance Awareness Month. Here at the Nooky Box, we believe that sex can be an incredible part of romance, and isn’t sexting the modern-day equivalent of the classic love letter?
Okay, so love letters didn’t err on the side of lewd emojis, but the idea to make your special someone feel, well, special was certainly the same. Here are some dos and don’ts for getting you started with sending steamy messages.
- DO feel free to be playful and even vague.
Emojis are a fun way to keep your messages on the lighthearted side. Alluding to a “replay” or an “encore” is a simple way for even the shyest among us to get the point across, loud and clear.
DON’T send playful takes on nursery rhymes.
It can be nerve-wracking to come up with a hot text, especially if your sweetie is better at it than you are. That being said, it’s probably best to try not to slip into rhyme schemes unless you’re going for—and can achieve—a Shakespeare-quality sonnet.
- DO get descriptive and extend an invitation.
Erotica tends to describe. Every. Little. Detail. Why? Because it gets our motors running! If you’re feeling bold enough, use some titillating adjectives to inspire fantasy for your reader, and perhaps even invite them to join you for some fun.
DON’T use the word “moist” or photos of Nicolas Cage.
Obviously, some of our bits are moist, but this is one of those words no one really wants to read while they’re getting revved up. As for Nic, while the temptation to troll your sweetie with the intense stare of the Cage Man may be overwhelming, just… Don’t.
- DO use sexting to aid in living out your fantasies.
Role-playing is so much fun, and it offers such a great opportunity for sexting. Come up with some characters, prepare any necessary props, and send your babe the story.
DON’T use all caps or try to include the plot of any Tom Hanks film.
Yes, we’re even talking about Sleepless in Seattle and You’ve Got Mail. Tom Hanks is not your sexting role model, folks. Think Tom Hiddleston, maybe even Tom Cruise (maybe), but not Tom Hanks. Never Tom Hanks.
- DO get the ball rolling, even if you don’t know what to say.
It’s better than nothing and you’ll get the hang of it in no time!
DO get saucy.
It is sexting, after all.
DO make a move.
Are you hoping for some sexy photos? Phone sex? Physical sex?
DON’T get caught in an avoidance loop!
This is not sexy—at all. Even if your partner starts sending vague messages, keep the momentum up by using descriptive words and hot scenarios, and by getting your point across. They might be nervous, and the more open and encouraging you are, the more safe they’ll eventually feel getting as frisky as you! If you’re working on getting more outside your comfort zone yourself, describe how turned on you are, or one of your fantasies in detail. If you really want to know what your sweetheart desires, ask them to describe the perfect night with you, and tell them to make sure to include every single specification. Keep this sexting train on track.
Anybody can send a risqué text—all it takes is a little bit of confidence. You’ve got the know-how now, so hit the “send” button already! Yay sex!